VFW: Battle Royale!

It was a Battle Royale on superheroes night at the VFW, with the Avengers (Chicks and Dicks) holding off the Justice League (Room Two) to win the night. The Fantastic Four (We're Here for the Beer) had another excellent night, taking third for the second week in a row. The Yancy Street Gang (Pretzel Eating Beer Drinking Yahoos) welcomed back a recovering Dave to take fourth. The Powerpuff Girls (Mixed Company - apologies to Jack and Kirk, since I can't think of another group of three superheroes) were fifth, followed by the Dynamic Duo of Dennis (Batman) and Mel (Robyn). That meant Sergeant Rock and His Howling Commandos (Commander's Choice) gets to pick a theme and they're going with "Television Shows: 1955-1965" - how's that for being specific? Not too far behind were the X-Men (Boys Have Godsticks, Girls Have Shame Caves), the Teen Titans (Team BBC) and the Sinister Six (Six Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest). And the Metal Men (Zombies) want to point out that they didn't do their usual meltdown.

Lordy. Lordy, Flavin's 40!

Happy Birthday to big-time trivia fan John Flavin, who's entering his fifth decade of life today. John and his family played for many years at Curtis' shows as the Arrogant Bastards and he was instrumental in getting trivia started at Brendee's, where he bartends Wednesday nights. Congrats to mom Kathy, too, for what I imagine was a difficult birth! (He's a big boy.)

Bube's: Quietly Sneaking Up on the Leaders

Tonight was a fun night as teams rose and fell throughout the competition. Quietly Making Noise (above) were the winners ain the end, followed by the That's What She Said and Behold the Shock and Awe As We Drop Our Nutsack Jihad On You Infidels! Speaking of infidels, The Infidels and Their Muslim Friend recovered from two horrible rounds to place fourth, followed by Lord Bergamot Farthammer the Fourth (and congrats to the Lord for getting in med school). TDC was sixth, which gave the J.S. Gand theme choice (see below).

Danielle of That's What She Said didn't like her last picture from a couple weeks ago, but she'll have to settle for this grainy cell-phone shot of her and Jeremy and the Anther Man. I think I owe them a round of beers.

Brent wanted to call this shot "Crista blows," but I'm going with "Crista demonstrates how to properly construct a balloon-a-copter," her prize from the Trashbag of Deelite.

The Jon Shober Gang had a really good night, only missing the money slots by one question. As seventh-placers, they get to choose the theme for next week and they're going with "old school" Pokemon video games. By old school, they mean 1998.

Fireworks Are Coming!

This summer marks my fifth year as host at Bube's and the VFW. To celebrate, I'm holding May Madness Extravaganzas at those two venues. Up for grabs: tickets to a Lancaster Barnstormers game on Saturday, July 19th - complete with fireworks! The more often your team plays, the better chance of winning. Details at the shows!

Chuckles: Everything in Alignment

The stars were in alignment for Skirtland, and so was Lee, as they leapt from fifth to first to claim the gold. Ubersmack was second, followed by those guys from the Lollipop Guild, I mean, the Midget Gerkins. World Beer Advocates the Lethal Amoebas were fourth, right ahead of Bill and Marge, who overcame their dismal first and second rounds to claim fifth. Spider Pig got caught in its web and tripped to sixth. The Talent Scouts and the Tidy Bowlers tied for seventh, so we're going with two themes: Animaniacs and Famous People Named Bill or Billy. Also: we learned that Karen's KC obsession continues on with her grandchild K of K and K and that the Gnomies dig the Flight of the Conchords.

Spider Pig, usual Bube's suspects, finally reunited and teamed up with Sue's Crew. They're getting together again to eat some jelly sandwiches from Kim's recipe book.

Excitement at the Day Job

Working at a library isn't exactly a thrill a minute, but there was some excitement yesterday afternoon when some guys decided to do some radical pruning outside my window.

Reminder: Relay for Life Trivia Show Saturday!

I'd like to alert everyone one more time of a special trivia show for a worthy cause to be held this Saturday (April 26th). It's a Relay for Life fundraiser being hosted by Billy Warmth (Cafe Chuckles players may know him as Bill of Out of the Vortex). As a Relay team captain, this cause is close to my heart. I'm amazed at some of the success stories of the American Cancer Society and saddened by the miles we have to go.

I can't attend this special show, but hopefully you can!

-Mike

Here are the details:

On Saturday, April 26, Celi's Clubhouse at Crossgates Country Club is hosting a special TRIVIA EVENT to raise funds for the American Cancer Society in memory of Millersville University's Dr. Centola. Join Earth Trivia's Bill "Buddha" Warmkessel from 5 -7 pm for early-evening trivia fun, raffles, and prizes. Bring your appetite because 15% of food sales will be donated to Dr. Centola's Relay Team, "The Art of the Possible." Celi's is SMOKE FREE and deck will be open if nice weather. No ticket needed to enter. Arrive early for a good seat!

VFW: Purple Heart Awarded

Paul gave his heart to Sheila Brubaker-Oatman-soon-to-be-Beenck tonight at the VFW as the B52s captured second place, behind the resurgent Chicks and Dicks. Another trio, Room Two was third, right ahead of the Trish-spearheaded Alice in Wonderland. We're Here for the Beer, featuring TV uber-nerd Steve was fifth, followed by Frank's Lucky Silver Dollar. There was a tie for seventh, but the Hackers won't be able to attend next week, giving Dennis and Mel the theme choice. They're going with superheroes.

Erma and Cody debated the advantages and disadvantages of Carmen being stuck in Jamaica.

Bube's: They Tapped It

Nathan of Da Nutsack Clan Ain't Nuthin' to F*** Wit is styling in his Shirt of the Week from last week. The 'sacks trio had a commanding five question lead and claimed this week's gold, besting Just Say No to Garden Gnomes, Shannon's former team. Shannon, meanwhile, spun off by himself to become Name, Occupation and How Do You Know the Defendant? Lizard Man, Lizard Man and The Adventures of the Lizard Men, winning the prize for the Name Most Likely To Give Me Hand Cramps.

The Toxic Olives invaded Bube's and tied for third with the Tony Danza Slap! Then it was a Captain Jack tiebreaker with Laura taking on first time jack-offer Mark. Mark staged a come from behind victory to give the Slap! the bronze.

Brent of the Wise Men was joined by Crista and Tariq to become the prophetically named 7th Place Here We Come. (Technically they were eighth, but who's counting?) They chose The Nation of Islam as next week's theme.

Cloud 7 is ready for a round of triple sec shots.

The Chipmunk Jamboree, AKA Vanessa's Harem, had to settle for a three-way tie for fifth with Eat It Raw and Team Discovery Channel.

Don't Forget To Vote Today

Radio Theatre Friday at Bubes!

The Ladies Temperance League, Mount Joy Chapter, finds our humor distasteful and immoral, but they are strangely attracted to it. Don't forget it's this Friday night at 8 P.M. in the Alois part of Bube's. See you then!

VFW: Shitz in Wonderland

Shitz and Giggles are showing us their better sides as they get ready to down their victory drinks. After adding Alice and Laurie of Alice in Wonderland, the Giggles were catapulted to the top spot while the itchy guys of the Vagisil team, who had been leading all night. slid to a tie for fourth.

Was it a coincidence that the B52s came in second once Paul and Sheila returned? Hmmmmm....

Here's a nice pic of We're Here for the Beer. They captured third place with the help of Steve's unhealthy knowledge of '60s television.

Room Two had to settle for seventh, and they're going with a popular theme: World War II.

For those of you who were wondering who named themselves Vagisil Eliminates Feminine Itch and Odor, here they are.

Nick and one of the "Young" (and I use the term loosely) Bucks.

Bube's: Bacon, Bacon, Bacon, Bacon!

Karen and Jamie of the Tesla Death Rays (AKA the Dude and the Chick @ the End of the Bar) took a break from their respective world travels to visit Bube's. They won a box of Yogo roll-ups that they claimed looked like bacon. So, if you eat at Karen's, beware any sweet-smelling burgers! They also were the theme-picking team for next week. Inspired by a Munsters question, they are going with "Facts About Fred Gwynne."

Team Discovery Channel and the Wise Men were tied for sixth, followed by (in reverse order) the Tony Danza Slap! I Wish I Could Remember What I Ate In My Sleep Last Night (Dedicated to Derek Nowak) and the Friends of Bill tied for third with first-timer Tim going against veteran Jack-offer Karen in the tie-breaker. Tim prevailed. When Team Nutsack Jumps In A River It Doesn't Get Wet, the River Gets Nutsacked took the silver and the Chubby Stubbies the gold.

Tim of the Friends of Bill raises a glass to his bronze medal-winning team.

The Chubby Stubbies somehow managed to ace the difficult last round.

Radio Comedy This Weekend!

As some of you know, I'm involved with a performing troupe called the Not-Ready-For-Drive-Time Players that puts on raunchy radio comedy shows. The group does staged readings of Howard Stern-ish (Sternesque?) comedy skits in the style of an old-fashioned radio show, complete with sound effects and commercial spoofs. We've done Halloween and Christmas shows in the past and this year we've added one in the Spring. You have three chances this weekend to see it:

Friday, April 18th, 8 P.M. Bube's Brewery, Mount Joy (upstairs in Alois)
Saturday, April 19th, 7:30 P.M. Appalachian Brewing Company, Gettysburg
Sunday, April 20th, 5 P.M., Appalachian Brewing Company, Harrisburg (Chris Ivey will be covering my Chuckles trivia show that night)

Guitarist Eric Weiss will also perform Friday and Saturday night, while the band The Committee performs Sunday night.

Admission: $5 (cheaper than almost a half of a bad movie!)

Beware: Mature (so to speak) audiences only!

Hoping to see you this weekend,
Mike

Chuckles: Bowlers Form Their Own Country

The Tidy Bowlers were starting their own grocery store tonight as they cornered the Trashbag market. It was a very close scoring night, with three teams (Chillin' with My Gnomies, the Coochy Snorchers and Skirtland) only missing third place by one point. The T-birds and the Intoxicated Intellectuals were tied for third, but months of playing Crocodile Dentist with his kid paid off for Brad, as the IIs won the tie-breaker. The three-headed Ubersmack was second, seven points behind the surprisingly lucid Jay and Lorraine.

Chris Ivey will be our substitute host next week. Since there was a three-way tie for fifth, I decided to go easy on Chris and declare it to be a theme-free night. I'll be performing with the Spring Radio Theatre Comedy Troupe in Harrisburg that night (see above post). Please be kind to Chris.

The T-Birds were oh-so-close, but then captain jack bit Bill twice and they fell to fourth.

The Tidy Bowlers were happy to share their Marshmallow Mateys with the Coochy Snorchers. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

The Mezes want to officially protest the last round.

Damion at Annie Bailey's this Thursday

Singer songwriter and stawlart Earth trivia friend Damion Wolfe will be playing at Annie Bailey's this Thursday night (April 17th) from 8 to 11. Hope to see you there!

Here Comes the Rain Again

It's supposed to be rainy this weekend, so I'd like to get some rest, but our radio comedy troupe is gearing up and practicing for shows in Mount Joy, Gettysburg and Harrisburg. First up: Bube's Brewery (actually upstairs in Alois') next Friday April 18th at 8 P.M. If you like raunchy, Howard Stern-like humor, you're in for a treat! I'm the understudy for Al Gore, so I 'm going to rent An Inconvenient Truth. I'm cereal! (a reference for you South Park fans out there)

More details to come!

VFW: Food, Glorious Food!

This is the happiest Brooks and Dunn were all night, since it was taken right before the brain-crunching last round. For once, everyone enjoyed high scores on the picture round. Maybe because it was based on one of everybody's favorite topics, food. At the end of the competition, Chicks and Dicks with Steve (not Bill) claimed the top spot for the second week. The two man terror team of Jerky Pat and Kirk were only two points behind, since Kirk did not eat enough broccoli as a child. Pink Floyd's biggest fan, Room Two took third, while Shitz and We're Here for the Beer tied for fourth. Sixth went to the imploding Zombies, while Young Bucks with special guest Airman E-1 Matt Miller, on leave from Afghanistan, got the theme-picking spot. They're going with Family Guy, so bring your talking dog with you next week.

John and Dee ditched Paul and Sheila for Michael and the mysterious Mr. X.

Thanks to Chris and Greg of Prius (AKA Outback) for providing me with one-liners all night.

Bube's: Faster Than Vermont Syrup in April

Marie returned from the wilds of Vermont to give Don't You Wish Your Nutsack Was Hot Like Me a much needed shot of estrogen. They also won the night's competition, capping off her triumphant visit. The Tony Danza Slap was only 2 points behind, followed by a tie between TDC and We Have No Half and Half, But We Have Duck Sauce and We're Out of Wings. Justin and Janelle, AKA Yankee Hotel Foxtrot were fifth and the Toxic Olives were sixth. You'll have to dig further in the blog to find who was seventh.

Tom is ticked off that Captain Jack wanted a beer after biting Seth's finger. Here's some Earth Trivia trivia: Team Discovery has never won a Captain Jack-off. Tonight their lack of Jack-off skills doomed them to fourth place.

Brad, Patty, Erin and Van made me say that I wouldn't say where they placed in the rankings, but they are the ones who are picking next week's theme: Dumb and Dumber.

Keri joined the hands of Sam to become Alpha Squad Seven (A Quinn Martin Production).

The Weird Sisters were sailing through until they crashed on the rocks of the Picture Round.

Double A and the Godfather were hoping for seventh, but had to settle for a decorative pig platter, which they promptly gave away to these two lasses.

Whatever Happened to the Trashbag Turtle?

Oh the humanity!

Name That Tuna!

I'd like to put in a good word for a music show that I've been enjoying lately. It's called Name That Tuna and I've been playing it the last few weeks at Prudhomme's Cajun Kitchen in Columbia with some friends and family. Hosted by Ponytail Bob, it's a simple concept, yet addictive and fun. Bob plays tunes and you have to name the artist and title. He plays almost the entire song, so even if you've never heard it, you can take a stab at the title.

This week Bob is adding a Wednesday night show (beginning at 8 P.M.) at the Villa Nova West on Columbia Avenue. You can find much more info on his website. I hope to get there after my Lititz VFW show, so maybe I'll see you there.

Santacat Says...

Only 261 days until Christmas!

Chuckles: Two by Two

It was couples night at Chuckles, with the two top spots going to two dynamic duos. Bill and Marge of Out of the Vortex recovered from a disastrous picture round to take first, followed by the Lethal Amoebas. The Price Is Right once again were third, followed by a tie between Skirtland and Ubersmack, who had been hoping for five in a row. Jason and Nick had a fantastic last round, as We Can Win with Tickets tied with the Talent Scouts for sixth. That meant K Squared C Squared was in seventh and they're going with bridge (as in the card game, not the Tappan Zee). The Tidy Bowlers really enjoyed the Smartee beans, while Dawn and Trish could have used Sue's NASCAR knowledge. The Gnomies found that downsizing caused more arguing while the Bowmans headed for the hills.

Jay and Lorraine of the Lethal Amoebas got 8 out of 10 right in the last round, without the help of Extra Special Guest Star Alan.