Missy and Friend of Missy are going to put their picture up on MySpace. I registered with MySpace, but have yet to fill out my profile. Stay tuned.

Bube's: The Monster Mash

I left my notes at home, but, in the mean time, here are some pix from Tuesday night's tribute to monsters.

The Toxic Olives had a monstrously-good last round, with 9 out of 10 correct to take home the gold.

The Tony Danza Slap! strike some monstrous poses as they celebrate Sarah's birthday and also the silver medal. They are concerned that they can't seem to get any placing other than seventh or second.

Brent, Van, Keith, Brad and Bradwife (The Wise Men) are showing off their monstrous prize: a Tubbiebuddie Shark that you can't put in water (sounds like a candidate for the Island of Misfit Toys to me). They're all Nebraska-bound this weekend for Van's wedding, so have a safe trip and congratulations! ANd to make the week extra-special, they got to chose the theme for next week: the master thespian known as Steven Seagal.

Chuckles: Just for the Halibut

Tonight's competition, I am proud to say, featured some of the worst puns in Picture Round history. The theme was "seafood," so we had "Salmon" Diane, "Mrs. Paul" McCartney (Heather Mills) and my personal favorite, "Halle Butt." After the groaning was over, we declared a new team, 2 Down Autos, the winner. They beat Ubersmack by 2 points and Out of the Vortex Featuring Birthday Boy Billy by 4. There was a tie for fourth between The Talent Scouts and Sue's Crew. That was quite an achievement for Sue, since she was flying solo tonight. Skirtland was sixth, followed by a tie for seventh between the Tidy Bowlers (Yay!) and Shrimpy's. Since Shrimpy's was relatively new, I let them pick the theme and they're going with 50s music.

First-time players Toby and Sean celebrate their victory.

Some ungrateful people make nasty faces when they get free gifts from the Trashbag of Deelite, but this is the kind of reaction I like to see: Mike is stoked that he won a can of Old Bay Black Pepper Seasoning!

Deric recommends Hellman's Tartar Sauce.

VFW: A Zorse Is a Zorse, of Course, of Course

Okay, this is off the top of my head (ow, that hurts!), since I left my notes at home. Mixed Company had a stellar last round and took first place. The B52s got their act together and took second, while Room Two took third, passing the Good, Bad and Crazy team. Scoot of Boot, Scoot and Annie placed seventh and chose Steely Dan as his theme. Don wished the old TV Western questions were older. Carol wished she could eat cake mix out of the box. Trish wished I would stop asking Ben and Jerry's questions. And Hannah's team (above) wished that I could provide proof that zorses exist.

Bube's: The Loch Mess Monster

This is the scene that greeted players Tuesday night at Bube's, as Market Street has been stripped to its core. Brave players who found the secret passage were treated to a fantastic night of trivia, featuring an almost-perfect score by the 'sacks and the return of the Crabby Dicks. Here are some pix of the Sax and Dix:

The adult half of The Nutsacks Are Currently Videotaping Everyone Else's Signals, So Beware! stayed a little longer after the show to celebrate their team-high score of 97 points!

This week they were known as The Banana Hammocks (there's gotta be a story behind that) and they took second!

Brent, with Keith, doing the traditional "picture of a picture-taker." The Wise Men woke up in the fourth round and claimed third place. They are Nebraska bound to attend Van's (aka Casper's) wedding.

You can barely see her in this pic, but that's Tracy (not Traci), celebrating her birthday once again at Bube's with K.T., Helen and the rest of "Tracy's Case of Crabby Dicks Flared Up After a Year-Long Absence." History was made when they aced the picture round. And missing Dick Dale was on the phone from Florida to witness the historic occasion.

Tracy's Birthday Monster enjoyed a Guinness after the show and hopes to make it to Bube's next week, since the theme (as chosen by the Tony Danza Slap!) is "monsters."

Chuckles: After Class Crafts

This is all that remains of an odd night of trivia: Stumpy McDooglehead, a creature created from the Trashbag of Deelite. It's amazing how you can make craft items without glue. I've Got Your Answer Right Here traded Chris for Erika and took home the gold. Sue's Crew once again same soooo close to the top prize, but lot by only four points. Ubersmack was shooting for seventh, but had to settle for third. The Lethal Amoebas were missing their other half and took fourth. The Tidy Bowlers (Yay!) stole each others' tickets and placed fifth. 4 Minus Two (must sing) got two prizes right away and placed sixth, while Karen and Connie got the coveted seventh place spot. They chose "seafood" as their theme for next week.

Captain Jack finally got some tail.

Caught in the Act

Here's Cylo attempting to pick the pocket of an unsuspecting fan.

I think the cat days of summer are finally over.

VFW: Oops!

For the first time ever in close to six years, I screwed up announcing the winners. Everyone's favorite Deadheads, the Foreplayers, are still the first place team, but I failed to notice that Nix and Lix and Nat tied for second with the Good, the Bad and the Crazy. I have a feeling that Nick will make me pay for this for a looong time.

The cheesecake cookie eating Mixed Company was in third, followed by D&M and the Addisonless Grateful Robert. We're Here for the Beer tied with Vern and Company for sixth, so we had a spinoff for the right to choose a theme. Don was the winner, so he chose Covered Wagon Theater. That was a little too obscure, so we agreed on the more wide-ranging "Old TV westerns," which should thrill Kirk's son.

The big news for the night was the return of the Chicks and Dicks team. Just like the swallows returning to Capistrano, Irma and crew flew back to the nest after their annual summer hiatus. The other big story was the Foreplayers' victory, since they never expected to do well with the theme. They were so excited by the win that I think they are going to rent a bus and follow the Dead on tour.

Tom and Nick celebrate their unannounced 2nd place victory with a smooch.

Brie, Cass and Gary (The Good, the Bad and the Crazy) brought along some extra family firepower and claimed second place!

Bube's: Things That Go Cheap

The Cheap Escorts had what I think is their highest placing yet, taking third place with an impressive 78. They were only one question behind the Tony Danza Slap!, who were only one question behind tonight's champs, the Steve Guttenberg star-making Stonecutters. The Nutsacks Feel Like the Hostesses Are Slighting Us By Making Us Sit Withe These Peons made a lot of friends with that name and placed fourth. Bobby Bonilla Is One of the Wise Men, Team Discovery Channel and Spider-Pig all tied for fifth. Lisa and Meredith joined Laura's gang to make The Toxic Olives, Now With 20% More Ovaries, and took sixth. The Shirt of the Week featuring a farting Leprechuan, was won by Tom and was drenched with black lager by the end of the evening.

A Multitude of Casualties had an up and down night, finishing seventh. Despite Janelle's objections, they chose "Jean Claude Van Damme" as their theme. So, beware of evil twins next week.

I Smell a Lawsuit

F and M recently unveiled their new mascots, Ben and John, who bear a striking resemblance, I think, to another duo of crotchety old men:

Chuckles: The Fall of Troy

Okay, I'll admit it, sometimes in the picture round I can be downright evil. It was Dallas Cowboys night at Chuckles, so nine out of the ten pix were theme-related. Then I threw in the picture at the left as a ringer. 95 percent of the teams thought it was Troy Aikman, but it was his separated-at-birth twin brother Harry Connick, Jr. I tried to help with the piano in the background, but the trap was set. Bwah-ha-ha!

It was a great night of trivia with five teams all within one question winning it all. When the dust settled, Marge and Bill held on to their lead, by one measly point:

1. Out of the Vortex - 64 pts.
2. The Lethal Amoebas - 63 pts.
3. Skirtland - 61 pts.
4. We've Got Your Answer Right Here - 60 pts.
5. Sue's Crew - 59 pts.

The Tidy Bowlers placed 7th and chose the movie Cars as their theme. That should cheer Owen Wilson up.

The Tard Kart Heroes won some finger paints so they can decorate the 25 foot snake that is welded to their dashboard (soory about that). Yvan Eht Nioj used their Trashbag prize, a box of Froot Loops to flavor their beer, while the aforementioned Bowlers had 24 hours to scarf down their box of donuts. Also, welcome aboard to Bailey's Crew, who manahed to place eighth despite missing the entire first round.

Someone Stop This Cow

As previously discussed, I have an ongoing feud with the Lancaster Barnstormers' mascot, Cylo. Here we see some more evidence from Saturday night's game, where the thing is making a lewd gesture at one of the staff.

I'm Not Going To Touch It, You Touch It

Saturday afternoon I assisted Justin with his trivia show at Manheim Township's Community Day at Overlook Park. It was an odd affair, since the audience was 100 feet away from the host and separated by a rolling hill. But, through the miracle of modern technology (i.e. a cordless mike), I was able to do my Ed McMahon routine from far, far away. A good time was had by all and it exposed the show to some new people, so hopefully we'll get to do the show again next year.

Cylo-hating Zach and Justin take a well-deserved break after a sweltering day of trivia. Justin has to rest up for his debut at Brendee's on Monday night, where he'll be doing all-sports trivia.

Flatbed Ford at Chameleon

Here's a crummy cell-phone pic of Flatbed Ford at the Chameleon on Friday night. Headed by Bube's own Josh Longo, they put on a fantastic show, with killer sound. Hopefully they'll be back at the Chameleon soon. In the mean time, you can catch them next at Bube's on October 13th, or check out their MySpace page.

VFW: Engagement Photo?

Robert and Addison, also known as Raddison, celebrate getting to pick a theme, since they placed seventh. They chose the Grateful Dead, so bring out your Deadheads next week. Sixth went to the Nat-fortified Nix Lix, the Boomerangs and Kathy and Susan (Kathy's highest ranking ever), while fourth went to D&M at the faaaaaarrrr end of the bar. I somehow managed to choose the one Howdy Doody character that Don had never heard of, so We're Here for the Beer had to settle for fifth. The Foreplayers, hepped up on the sugar from an entire box of chocolate-covered donuts, placed third. The B52s had a very impressive 81, but Mixed Company came from behind and squeaked past them with a one point victory.

Bube's: Worst Ever

Aaron of The Tony Danza Slap attempts to open up The Worst Trashbag of Deelite Prize Ever with his bare teeth. His team also won some chocolate syrup, which makes a great topping for pigs feet. The Slap tied with Even the Nutsacks Beat Michigan This Week and almost made seventh place. But that went to Nebraska-bound Brent and Brad of the Wise Men. They chose Bobby Bonilla as their theme for net week. Fifth went to The Ovaries Wish to Issue a Formal Apology to Owen Wilson. There was a tie for third (see below) and second went to the Jelly Roll Mortons, who stumbled slightly in the last round. That allowed the two-man Chubby Stubbies to make an impressive last-minute charge to take first place.

There was an important Captain Jack-off for third place, since Team Discovery Channel tied with Charlemagne in Sweatpants and ten dollars was at stake. Here we see Charlemagne's Brian talking smack to TDC's Seth. It must have worked, since Seth went down. (Photo credit: Becky Horn of Hornmark Originals)

Proving that there's a genetic component to artistic talent, here is another Hornmark Original: Becky's stunning interpretation of her Trashbag prize - a color-your-own Tinkerbell.

After the trivia, Tim tried in vain to get folks interested in a board game from 1980 called "All About Lancaster." The rules were way too complicated for the night crew, even though Captain Dan (pictured above center) managed to corner the crack market on Vine Street.

Chuckles: They Work Hard for Their Answers

Skirtland's Lee, Allan, Ben and Kay bask in their impressive 91 point victory on a crowded Labor Day night of trivia. The visiting Grateful Red and the Lethal Amoebas (see below) took second and third. Right behind them were The Price Is Right, the up and coming Sue's Crew, and a brand new team, Malik. That left Out of the Vortex and Lionel in seventh, so they chose the dreaded Dallas Cowboys as next week's theme.

Mandy G and the East Coast Family were doing well until the end, as were Ketron and KCC. The Tard Kart Heroes, meanwhile, can't wit 96 hours to see their snake grow.

The Grateful Red scored second place with only their second trivia appearance (they played two years ago up at Bube's). They also won a set of magic tricks, a cheese grater and (Cookie's favorite) a Halloween Barbie. Next up for the ladies: camping in a wigwam on sticks (seriously, I'm not making this up.)

Ben and Lauren were spouseless for the weekend, so they joined Jay and Lorraine for a reunion of the original Lethal Amoebas. (Baby Amoeba Phil decided to stay out of this emotionally-charged picture.)

VFW: The Last Shall Be First

As one of my high school teachers once told me, it's not the size of the fight in the dog, it's the size of the trivia players. Frank and Dave scored a major come from behind victory, leaping from ninth to first in the last round. In fact, all the early round leaders crashed and burned. The Young and the Listless, languishing in eighth, charged in the end to take third, while the Manolo wearing Nix Lix took second. We're Here for the Beer, who had been in second, plummeted to seventh. But at least they got to pick a theme: Howdy Dowdy. King Kirk declared that all Trashbag prizes should be able to be eaten at the VFW and demanded ice cream for his cones. Paul, meanwhile, demanded easy-to-read picture sheets.

VFW: Tonight's Theme

Oops! Forgot to mention that tonight's theme, as chosen by Nick of Nix Lix, is designer shoes!

Bube's: Bottom of the Bag

The Bad News Nutsacks ponder their victory in this post-show shot. They had a commanding 12-point victory, aided by the 10 point question in the last round. My Exploding Ovaries Put Owen Wilson in the Hospital could only look on in amazement. Back in seventh, with a little help from Matt, was Spider-Pig, who chose "Sex in the City" as their theme. The origami-making TDC and A Dirty Shame tied for sixth. Beating them by two points were the Toxic Olives, followed by the Pirate Ninja Robots from Hell. All of those teams were only one question away from second place!

Trashbag Prizes were going three at a time in a special clearance sale. It was all the little items that no one chooses (sort of like the Island of Misfit Toys). My favorite prize was the deodorant with the wondrous name "Lady Stick." Here we see Laura demonstrating how to use it:

The Tony Danza Slap made good use of the theme and had what I think is their highest placing yet, coming in second.

Since the other Wise Men were following a star somewhere, Brent joined the Pomagrams to become Poma-Wise. It was a good match, since they took the bronze (and a patriotic bat for bashing commies).

Presenting the Pirate Ninja Robot Unicorns FROM HELL!

Nathan's shirt says it all (courtesy of Manheim Twp's Quiz Bowl)

The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Novelty Chickens has targeted Kumiko and Craig as prime offenders.

Chuckles: Girl Power!

Kim, Jen and Sue are a new team to be reckoned with at Chuckles. Actually, Sue was a regular a while back and Jen had a few games under her belt, so Kim was the only virgin. They were in the lead until the last round, when Out of the Vortex had a come-from behind victory. Ubersmack ended up in a tie with SJK, and Captain Jack bit Sue twice, so they had to settle for third. Skirtland was only one point behind, followed by KCC and We Got Your Special Guest Right Here. The Lethal Amoebas claimed that they were aiming for seventh, which they did, so next week's theme is "British Sports Cars." We Can Win This! (With Tickets) changed their name to We Didn't Win Any Tickets while Clueless in Lancaster were content to play with their dinosaurs in the back. The Spiffs, meanwhile, basked in their perfect first round score.